Violence
Under no circumstances should violence be tolerated – it is an infringement of your human rights and no one should ever be subjected to it.
It can be difficult to see when someone is in a violent relationship, even if they are close to you. Due to fear or shame, they may well deny that any abuse is taking place, and can become very good at concealing what’s really going on. It’s also common for the person who is being abused to keep forgiving their abuser - they can become blinkered into believing the abuser’s apologies and can convince themselves it won’t happen again – unfortunately, in most cases, it does.
An abusive relationship often finds one person seeking power over another through any number of methods, including threats, physical violence, emotional abuse and sexual assault.
If your partner behaves in any of the following ways it could be a sign that you are in a abusive and possibly violent relationship:
* Acts jealous and possessive
* Tries controlling or limiting your life outside the home or your contact with friends, family or colleagues
* Humiliates you in front of others
* Puts pressure on you to have sex
* Behaves erratically and makes you scared to express your point of view
* Abuses drugs or alcohol
* Has a history of bad relationships
* Believes that women should be submissive
* Is physically abusive. Abusers often inflict physical abuse on parts of the body that are usually covered such as the back, stomach and thighs
If you are experiencing violence in a relationship you must do what you can to escape it. In some countries where women are seen as less powerful than men this can be particularly difficult. Firstly you should try and find someone you can talk to, this might be a friend, family member, colleague or professional counsellor – they will be able to give you help and advice.
There have been many cases of death or permanent injury as a result of violence in relationships, and violence can also destroy the ability for partners to talk honestly and openly about safe sex, HIV status and ways to reduce risk of infection. And if you can’t speak openly, you can’t control your sexual choices, including whether or not you use a condom.
No matter what anyone says, violence in a relationship is not your fault - and you have done nothing to deserve it.
